Don't tell him yer name Pike!

LD was chatting with serial Labour rebel Alan Simpson about the “plot” which he was suitably scornful of.

He said: “What astonished me was the incompetence and disorganisation of this latest attempt on the leadership.

“Poor Geoff seems to have emerged as the Captain Mainwaring of failed coups – there is no point in shouting ‘charge’ if you haven’t lined up the troops to go with you.

“I wasn’t involved simply because there was no wider involvement. It’s obvious there is dissatisfaction within the party, but everyone knows that half a coup is worse than no coup at all.

“In fact I’d almost be tempted to say that Downing Street would have paid good money for such a piece of political incompetence.”

Notice the nuance of his last line.

He points out that Downing Street has actually benefited – the door to a future more organised leadership challenge has been shut because this particularly incompetent one has been spiked early on.

It would be high conspiracy theory to suggest that Downing Street might actually have had something to do with the failed coup.

But if Geoff Hoon happens to pick up some sort of cushy post-politics position in the future then remember this blog.

What I am certain about is that Hoon is a man that doesn’t do anything without getting something.