Hoon wants a kick about!

You have to hand it to Geoff Hoon, he is trying his hardest to keep us guessing.

After his political career takes its last few gasps, the Notts MP is apparently trying to land a job at the Football League.

If that doesn’t work out he’ll have to go to even greater lengths to stay in the limelight.

Perhaps he could become the next human spider and start climbing tall buildings, or try and break the world record for the longest uninterrupted Morris Dance.

Even scarier is what might happen if he actually does pull it off. Matches will be delayed because shipments of balls are withheld while he takes “further advice”.

On the up side it might mean football fans across the country come up with terrace songs about him. “You’re Hoon and you know you are, you're Hoon and you know you are…”

I’m sure you lot can come up with some better suggestions.

The real losers in all of this are the people of his Ashfield constituency, for whom he doesn’t care enough to fess up about whether he plans to stand down.