Morning Glory

Tory ladies of a delicate disposition have been all a-fluster recently because of a newcomer on their office corridor.

They were used to neighbouring Labour’s Alan Meale, but recently the Mansfield MP has apparently been letting his old chum John Prescott share his office.

It probably wouldn’t have bothered them, I’m told, had Prezza not started to use Meale’s office as a morning changing room.

Unfortunately it has meant that the ladies have on occasion been confronted with the site of a topless Prescott – enough to shock even the slowest of morning starters into action.

Patronising Pat strikes again...

I rather enjoyed this little passage from A Journey about Blair letting Pat Hewitt talk at cabinet just to annoy John Prescott.

He wrote of Prescott: “He was definitely old fashioned and not great at working with a certain type of middle class woman, and though sound on the policy of gay rights was led more by his head than his heart.”

Mr Blair continues, telling how at cabinet Mr Prescott would sit “like a grumbling volcano ready to erupt” often because of one of the women that had spoken up.

He writes: “Patricia Hewitt was sure to get him going. She was in fact a really good minister and was excellent at the Department of Health, taking truly difficult decisions with immense determination, but at cabinet she would usually raise the women’s angle.

“John would make some slightly off colour remark if he was in a sour mood. I would then bring her in again just for the sheer entertainment of watching him explode.

“She would patronise him in the most wonderfully insensitive fashion: ‘Now John, that’s a very, very good point you’ve just made, and it’s always so worth listening to you.’”

You can actually hear Hewitt’s voice in your head when you read that last bit. Freakish.

Lord of the pies

While perusing details of the week ahead I noticed that there are a couple of new arrivals in the House of Lords this week.

John “Two Jags” Prescott and former Labour minister Quentin Davies will be introduced to the upper House on Thursday.

If you can’t remember who Davies is think bell tower renovation on expenses. I’m sure you know who Prescott is, but just in case this is a neat opportunity to embed this video…



Prezza in the Lords could be a sketch writer’s dream, hope he lives up to it…

Prescott's bile

"Whilst I knew we were short of money I didn’t realise we also lacked the will to fight these elections.

"The people responsible for this non-campaign – and make no mistake there was no campaign – were Harriet Harman, Caroline Flint, Douglas Alexander and yes, our former Communities Secretary Hazel Blears."

That was what Prezza spewed on Labourhome last night. Chances are Alastair Campbell, known not to be Harriet Harman's greatest fan, had a hand in it too.

Two jags, two sh**s and now two loo seats...

Prezza is like Noah's Arc, everything going two-by-two.

As there is so much being said about expenses I’ll keep this short. I only wanted to highlight my two (it's catching) favourite bits news-wise.

1) Prezza claimed for two loo seats in two years. Comedy genius.

2) Even David Miliband’s gardener queried whether it was necessary for the MP to spend so much doing up his home, given the short time he spent there.

Last night's argy-bargy

I’d been clinging on to the hope that the ruckus behind the Speaker's chair last night was a Labour MP versus a Tory MP.

Maybe even Pickles himself versus an equal heavyweight like John Prescott, or some sort of novelty fight involving Hazel Blears.

But reports this morning confirm rumours last night that at least one hack was involved, most unfortunate.

You can hear the jaw-jaw around the press gallery this morning.

Prezza rips it out of Mandy

On the note of blogging. This is V funny - hat tip to Waugh and Brogan for picking it up.